Normality: Suggest the Following when Engaging with Others

 

Definition of love

(1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties maternal love for a child

(2) : attraction based on sexual desire: affection and tenderness felt by lovers After all these years, they are still very much in love.

(3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests love for his old schoolmates

Read More ====> theories of love

Giving and Receiving

Express it with affection and genuineness, Recieve it with dignity, thanks, and profound appreciation of love and care.

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What is a Narcissist?

”Narcissistic personality disorder — one of several types of personality disorders — is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others”

 

What does he or she need, Narcissistic is pathological or excessive want for attention, pampering, and admiration from codependents, They do not consider the feelings, indeed opinions or preferences of others

 

They are offended super quickly

“You have a whole range of people who are Super Sensitive, lack empathy, unable to empathize they don’t feel bad when you feel bad, so without realizing it can hurt you.” Paradoxically though a narcissist’s own feelings can be hurt very easily

Some tendencies include ”from my experience dating one”

1. NEVER WRONG
2. DEVIOUS
3. METICULOUS
4. FACTUAL
5. EXPECTANT
6. ENTITLED
7. SCHEDULED
8. SELF CENTERED
9. FORGETFUL
10. CONTROLLING
11. APPLY EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL

<< this Superbook  gave me insights to understand and act>>>

 

My Encounter

The narcissist that I know is a very smart quick-witted person. so is this a measure of narcissists are they naturally smarter than the rest of us?

 

This is a good question, in my experience with what I [research and conclude as being a narcissistic personality] a mindset in believing they are more intelligent, even more organized. As it stands in this case I have to admit she a Ph.D. in Psychology holder.

Everyday Common Sense

However in normal daily situations she was hopeless, didn’t know about finances, and setting up a budget for anything, what was earn was money to be used,

Hence lived from month to month on the next paycheque

 

But paradoxically she expected me to take care of that, to be the brains in this area of financial needs and this lead me to understand clearly she didn’t want to be bothered.

She Sought to be socially respected and flaunted without realizing this act [or claim not to] with a smirk on the face.

Admiration and Adulation, Never Admitting

Love attention particularly and especially from men [the opposite gender]

Don’t get on or work well with women her age, feels disconnected from her so-called friends I met displayed a distinct distancing in the group, and watchful.

Despise or Cant take critical or challenging situations or confrontation,

If you manage that, you are drawn into other un-associated arguments where complaints come into play.

An accumulation of events pour right on out every time

They want facts in every argument or disagreement sometimes where there is none

The Dreaded

Many off-the-wall arguments were experienced all came like a waterfall, one of many occasion she went into an almost catatonic-like immobilized state on the bed and complained of palpitation, still enough energy to keep finding criticism with

‘’my medicines you know the ones I take’’ let me have them [and there were several of those to choose from in the fridge, ALL IN UKRAINIAN?

 

”You don’t love me as I do you” You’re Not showing your age [as if being senior to her, experienced, and taking whatever she cared to dispense my way, I was supposed to calmly and happily keep my composure?

YEAH! ….RIGHT!

Early Warnings of Battle

Early in the relationship I was shown the Red flag, But didn’t act on it, well why would I?

Showboating [Empathy]

When she told me her ex-had in the middle of a traffic junction slammed on the handbrake and as the car skidded promptly he leaped out to the car in a furious mood, Like you may see in the movie ”fast and furious?”

They love to control and dominate people, one more thing they become very angry if they don’t receive extra- special treatment.

If you recognize this personality, You better comply and show agreement

Ditto

Ironically enough I also ended up needing to get out of the car, Mine was similar but less spectacular than the ‘Ex’.  I had to distance myself from her so I instructed her to [‘’stop the car and let me out  as she was driving’’]  a block or 2 from her apartment,

My Ears were burning so certainly it was a coincidence or double whammy for her and shook her to the core. Boy did I pay for that gentler act later?

 

Demeanor~ Behaviour

Another Irritating expression was always a crooked smirk when important conversations were in progress and calculating posturing

 

Act and Control

Gaining attention she decided to grab my attention by walking up t me reaching out and Picking off my expensive sunglasses like a movie scene [again] while we were visiting a new location in China.

 

Calmly and deliberately tossing it over her shoulder into the river behind

Yes that ‘what you going to do about it’ smirk was there again plain as day saying

She really knew how to dig the knife-in and expected no retaliation or anger even see no harm in it.

 

The time Finally came with ultimatums where I had to decide if it was worth the long term anguish, uncertainties, and being an empath knowingly taking tantrums, disruptive moods, and rubbish from a narcissist it has had its day!

Facts and Tips Identifying These Groups of People

Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognising and Coping with Narcissists Paperback – 5 July 2016

by Craig Malkin (Author)

 

When most of us hear the word narcissism or narcissist, we envision vain, preening, braggarts who can’t stop talking about themselves. But most of the time, we’ve got it wrong;

Many narcissists aren’t driven by looks, fame, or money–some may even be shy or soft-spoken. The startling truth is we’ve been distracted by an empty stereotype that blinds us to far more reliable signs of danger–and an entire generation is suffering because of it.

 

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Should I Stay or Should I Go: Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist Paperback – 7 Nov. 2017

by Ph.D. Ramani Durvasula (Author)

”’How do you know if you are in a relationship with a narcissist–and what can you do about it?”

Narcissism is a modern epidemic–and it’s spreading rapidly. Narcissists tend to be pretty on the outside but empty on the inside.

While they are often successful, they are also controlling, manipulative, entitled, vain, and they have no empathy. If your significant other can be charismatic and charming one moment and leave you feeling disappointed, unsettled, and doubting yourself the next, you may be involved with a narcissist.

This dangerous relationship can slowly ruin your sense of well-being and ultimately your psychological health.

 

How to Handle a Narcissist: Understanding and Dealing with a Range of Narcissistic Personalities (Narcissism Books)

by Theresa Jackson  | 23 May 2017

#1 Amazon Bestselling Author on Narcissism and Grief for a Parent #

“How to Handle a Narcissist” is an informed guide to help you understand, handle, and live with extreme narcissists. This spectral approach to narcissism combines the latest research with real-life stories and practical advice.

Research

Research shows that the vast majority of people display self-enhancing tendencies to some degree or another and that these tendencies maintain and promote healthy self-esteem.

 

Prepare to be Tortured: – The Price You Pay for Dating a Narcissist

by A B Jamieson  | 12 Mar 2018

The Situation you never, ever want to find yourself.

At their mercy/ wants 100% attention

judgemental/ Consuming and in your space

defiant to a fault/ never at fault or wrong

hate contradictions or confrontation

denies responsibility as it’s always your decision to choose for them?

Pathological liars, deceitful and manipulative

Selective memory or congregate problems to nail you to the cross

Passive yet active control and pressurizing, stonewalling

 

When Love Is a Lie: Narcissistic Partners & the Pathological Relationship Agenda Paperback – 4 July 2013

by Zari L Ballard (Author)

When our committed relationship involves a narcissistic partner or someone with a narcissistic personality disorder, it is inevitable that the experience, at some point, will take a very dark turn. Pathological liars, chronic cheaters, and masters at passive-aggressive punishments (i.e. the silent treatment)

Narcissists follow a specific relationship agenda where every deceptive move is deliberately calculated to confuse and abuse the people who love them.

And, as crazy as it Seems, lovers of narcissists hang in there believing they can fix this quirky behavior even pretend to love them accepting time is the healer?…but the truth is that is impossible.

Narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths can never be fixed with good intentions and love, they need Professional therapy, its a compulsive behavior, and they themselves are overcome by the compunction. a 12-month hands experience of mine found that out, and the hardest way.

 

Even offering to or raising the topic of professional help ”together’ was an insult and brought about other unpleasant incidents

Children Under the Hammer of a Narcissistic Mother or Father

Be Ahead of a Narcissist Understand Their Compunction and Attitudes

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Summary~ is a Change Possible?

Change is something we are all capable of applying some of us require professional support, others family and awareness and coming to terms with this condition or problem

The fact remains that many people with narcissistic tendencies lack the care to face barriers. People with narcissistic tendencies may display grandiose behavior and fantasies.

 

They don’t allow space for others, needs must be acted on and met without failure and delays, and their conversations are primarily monologues. Also, the is also a need to express how good the Ex-BF was.

 

Their world allows only their perspective and methods, they rule and everybody else has to follow them. These very tendencies place them in a shallow and small group if any, friendship circle and not really allowed or accepted completely

 

Chris